Since Plans B and C are still shrouded in mystery for the time being, I'm just going to say that brainstorming with my daughter is great fun, and highly productive.
Usually the brainstorming we've done has been about test answers for her college classes; as she is almost finished with that it's a good thing we've found another outlet.
Friday, November 18, 2011
Plan A Moving Along In An Orderly Fashion
The Box Piles Grow - and I've already taken two loads over!
Excitement is tempered with dismay as I take a good look at all of the boxes and furniture that I'm going to be moving by myself.
The living room and dining room and front porch and kitchen of my 'good' house are stacked sky high with packed boxes which bury most of the furniture.
YIKES!
Then I just have to laugh at myself because after all, what the heck. It's not like I can't DO this thing, you know.
When the 'Buyer' officially said YES the first thing I wanted to do was start carting the boxes out to my little pick up truck and begin hauling them the half block to my studio. I was getting ready to do just exactly that when it struck me that it was DARK outside. It was COLD outside. It was WINDY outside. Plus I'd had a long day and was more tired than wired, AND a weekend of night shifts is staring me in the face.
Through my mind meander the words, "Just do it in an orderly fashion."
There's nothing orderly about deliberately zapping my strength when I know full well I'll need every ounce of it to get through a challenging weekend. There's nothing orderly about choosing to lug a houseful of stuff out into the cold and dark and wind when it's possible that milder days are right around the corner.
I checked the extended forecast.
Well skippity doo dah day, imagine that. Next week, when I have some days OFF, is supposed to bring better weather!
Hallelujah!
By the end of next week I'll be happily and contentedly sorting through all my stuff, taking inventory of what I have to work with in terms of both artwork and project materials.
And THAT, my friend, is something to look forward to!
Amid the chaos I will seek and find the quiet peace that has always pervaded that place, and it will calm me while I methodically, in an orderly fashion, battle the long dark of this coming Dakota Winter and transform chaos into tranquility.
That's the plan.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Plan A Progress: The Contract for Deed is Ready
It's exciting and a little strange-feeling to have written another legal document.
This one is definitely WAY less heart-wrenching than the divorce I wrote for my husband and myself lo these many years ago.
There's a bittersweet feeling to the process and I'm having a hard time trying to define it to myself, let alone getting the words right here.
The fact that it's basically a legal requirement means that I had it to do and so do it I have. And it wasn't all that hard once I found one on line that I could modify to meet our specific needs. The principles are simple and I simplified the wording without losing any of the pertinent necessities.
Anyway, it's done. All we have to do is take it to a Notary and sign it. That part feels distinctly satisfying.
In a very few hours now the 'Buyer' will be here to look at the 'Property' in the company of the 'Seller' (that would be me!) and we'll take it from there.
If she doesn't like it after all, or chickens out, it's not really going to be a great big deal as I have Plan B all ready to roll.
If she DOES like it and wants to go for it, we can get the 'Agreement' signed and notarized tomorrow and begin the moving! Needless to say, that is what I'm hoping for.
The thought of actually being able to live in my studio for the duration of this long dark Dakota Winter makes me happy. The thought of being able to work on the projects that will turn that 100 Year Old Home into one that I will spend my later years in is exciting.
AND, I'll have you know, I'm doing this in an ORDERLY FASHION.
This one is definitely WAY less heart-wrenching than the divorce I wrote for my husband and myself lo these many years ago.
There's a bittersweet feeling to the process and I'm having a hard time trying to define it to myself, let alone getting the words right here.
The fact that it's basically a legal requirement means that I had it to do and so do it I have. And it wasn't all that hard once I found one on line that I could modify to meet our specific needs. The principles are simple and I simplified the wording without losing any of the pertinent necessities.
Anyway, it's done. All we have to do is take it to a Notary and sign it. That part feels distinctly satisfying.
In a very few hours now the 'Buyer' will be here to look at the 'Property' in the company of the 'Seller' (that would be me!) and we'll take it from there.
If she doesn't like it after all, or chickens out, it's not really going to be a great big deal as I have Plan B all ready to roll.
If she DOES like it and wants to go for it, we can get the 'Agreement' signed and notarized tomorrow and begin the moving! Needless to say, that is what I'm hoping for.
The thought of actually being able to live in my studio for the duration of this long dark Dakota Winter makes me happy. The thought of being able to work on the projects that will turn that 100 Year Old Home into one that I will spend my later years in is exciting.
AND, I'll have you know, I'm doing this in an ORDERLY FASHION.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Orderly Fashion Plan A
Already addressed are the preliminary phases of Plan A, namely getting my 'good' house into loving hands that will take care of it and fill it with the laughter of children, and getting my stuff and myself into my studio's serenity and peace. And with any luck no more night shifts for me at work so my systems can settle into a regular routine that has a modicum of sense to it.
Once that is completed, hopefully in very short order, Plan A follows its natural progression, which has been in the planning stages for a very long time.
Basically the plan consists of modifying a 100 year old home into a wheelchair accessible one without compromising its historic integrity. Let it be a challenge to me.
One very positive aspect of the plan is that back in the day they built their doors wide and their floor plan is already conducive to chair mobility. There are no unreachable built in cupboards and no carpets to contend with. Everything's on one floor too, a serendipitous bonus. There are laundry hookups in the basement, as well as old wash sink set (although putting in laundry facilities on the main floor will be a pretty simple task); the attic is wide open and a lift in the attic hall will allow access without interfering with the use of the hall. It may also be possible to install a lift to provide basement access although I haven't really thought that one out all the way yet; it's just a glimmer of an idea, but having access to the entire house would certainly be an asset.
The beauty of the place is that nothing I want to do to it will in any way change the original floor plans. A door on the only side of the house that doesn't already have one and a doorway that wasn't there before are the only 'big' changes, and they aren't so very big. Everything else I plan to do will be absolutely easily reversible should anyone ever want it back the way it was.
Plan A's immediate goal is to get me through the long dark of this coming Dakota Winter by providing me with peace and serenity as well as a challenge to my mind and body. It is also designed to create a sense of satisfaction as the projects develop and progress.
When I'm not at work or possessed by projects, another of the studio's characteristics will come into play.
I don't refer to it as my studio for no good reason, you know. There's something about it that jump-starts creativity. It's where some of my best pieces have come to life. It's where I found out I can sculpt a face and still not be able to draw or paint the same face - go figure. Although I have found that I CAN produce fairly reasonable pieces in other places, I can't WAIT to get back in there and see what's waiting for me to find it! The anticipation and excitement are heady, a real strength in Plan A.
Wry chuckle ... the pieces that don't turn out to my satisfaction I can just burn in my wood stove and nobody will ever know they even existed!
There's enough sorting and filing to keep me busy for a good long time, just getting everything situated.
Then will come the floor treatments, the wall and ceiling treatments, the window treatments.
Then will come the building of accessible work counters and cupboards as the money accumulates to finance them. The plans are already done so it's just a matter of doing the building.
Also on the list is getting my double stainless steel sink set in and plumbed, as well as a walk in shower for the plumbing to-do list.
Eventually I'm going to want a counter cooktop, but for the time being my regular stove will do fine. For that matter the little wood stove would do fine for cooking purposes. I also have table top burners, microwaves, and a big roaster oven so I don't even really need the stove at all but I'll put it in anyway. The cold cupboard works great during the long dark of Dakota Winters for a refrigerator/freezer, but I'll put the ones I have in anyway.
IF everything works out and Plan A is a go, by next spring most of the inside projects will be either done or well under way and I can leave them alone and get busy on the outside ones during the most wonderful part of the Dakota Year. I will be in hog heaven while I'm finishing the roofing, getting the new door put in, and building ramps and decks in between working my 3-11 shifts.
Having something to look forward to is as important as seeing progress on what you're working on.
One of the outside projects I want to get under way is building a rock garage for my little pick up truck. Heaven knows there are plenty of rock piles around that nobody would object to me robbing. It doesn't have to be a very big garage. Besides hopefully serving its purpose when I get it done, it will be good practice for a bigger project I have in mind - but that's a part of Plan B so I'm not going to get into it quite yet!
Plan A, implemented in a duly orderly fashion, will keep me busy enough for quite long enough to get me through the next year!
Once that is completed, hopefully in very short order, Plan A follows its natural progression, which has been in the planning stages for a very long time.
Basically the plan consists of modifying a 100 year old home into a wheelchair accessible one without compromising its historic integrity. Let it be a challenge to me.
One very positive aspect of the plan is that back in the day they built their doors wide and their floor plan is already conducive to chair mobility. There are no unreachable built in cupboards and no carpets to contend with. Everything's on one floor too, a serendipitous bonus. There are laundry hookups in the basement, as well as old wash sink set (although putting in laundry facilities on the main floor will be a pretty simple task); the attic is wide open and a lift in the attic hall will allow access without interfering with the use of the hall. It may also be possible to install a lift to provide basement access although I haven't really thought that one out all the way yet; it's just a glimmer of an idea, but having access to the entire house would certainly be an asset.
The beauty of the place is that nothing I want to do to it will in any way change the original floor plans. A door on the only side of the house that doesn't already have one and a doorway that wasn't there before are the only 'big' changes, and they aren't so very big. Everything else I plan to do will be absolutely easily reversible should anyone ever want it back the way it was.
Plan A's immediate goal is to get me through the long dark of this coming Dakota Winter by providing me with peace and serenity as well as a challenge to my mind and body. It is also designed to create a sense of satisfaction as the projects develop and progress.
When I'm not at work or possessed by projects, another of the studio's characteristics will come into play.
I don't refer to it as my studio for no good reason, you know. There's something about it that jump-starts creativity. It's where some of my best pieces have come to life. It's where I found out I can sculpt a face and still not be able to draw or paint the same face - go figure. Although I have found that I CAN produce fairly reasonable pieces in other places, I can't WAIT to get back in there and see what's waiting for me to find it! The anticipation and excitement are heady, a real strength in Plan A.
Wry chuckle ... the pieces that don't turn out to my satisfaction I can just burn in my wood stove and nobody will ever know they even existed!
There's enough sorting and filing to keep me busy for a good long time, just getting everything situated.
Then will come the floor treatments, the wall and ceiling treatments, the window treatments.
Then will come the building of accessible work counters and cupboards as the money accumulates to finance them. The plans are already done so it's just a matter of doing the building.
Also on the list is getting my double stainless steel sink set in and plumbed, as well as a walk in shower for the plumbing to-do list.
Eventually I'm going to want a counter cooktop, but for the time being my regular stove will do fine. For that matter the little wood stove would do fine for cooking purposes. I also have table top burners, microwaves, and a big roaster oven so I don't even really need the stove at all but I'll put it in anyway. The cold cupboard works great during the long dark of Dakota Winters for a refrigerator/freezer, but I'll put the ones I have in anyway.
IF everything works out and Plan A is a go, by next spring most of the inside projects will be either done or well under way and I can leave them alone and get busy on the outside ones during the most wonderful part of the Dakota Year. I will be in hog heaven while I'm finishing the roofing, getting the new door put in, and building ramps and decks in between working my 3-11 shifts.
Having something to look forward to is as important as seeing progress on what you're working on.
One of the outside projects I want to get under way is building a rock garage for my little pick up truck. Heaven knows there are plenty of rock piles around that nobody would object to me robbing. It doesn't have to be a very big garage. Besides hopefully serving its purpose when I get it done, it will be good practice for a bigger project I have in mind - but that's a part of Plan B so I'm not going to get into it quite yet!
Plan A, implemented in a duly orderly fashion, will keep me busy enough for quite long enough to get me through the next year!
Go About It In An Orderly Fashion
I ran into a dear friend at the post office and asked him if he thinks I'm too old to have a life, as in a REAL life, not just a job and home, work and sleep, ad nauseum.
As we walked to our respective vehicles on packed snow and ice, I told him, "I think I want to expand my horizons, you know?"
He responded that he thought that was a great idea, paused as he was getting into his vehicle, and added, "Just go about it in an orderly fashion!"
I answered, "Well you know me! I always do!" and let go with a big belly laugh because he does know me and I NEVER do, apparently.
Even so, there is almost always a method to my madness, which I cleverly conceal behind seemingly random and irrational behaviors.
For instance, at the moment I am in the process of essentially giving away my 'good' house so that I can move half a block away into my 'tumble down cottage', which is quite truthfully a literal wreck of a place. It's one of those apparently irrational behaviors that reinforce the idea that I am indeed a bonified lunatic.
Explaining the method behind this madness here on my blog is not likely to blow my cover, as nobody even knows about it, let alone reads it!
Nobody knows about me giving my house away except a few people at work (one of whom is the buyer) and none of them are confidants of any of my family or people who know me here in my Small Town USA. The first indication they'll have is when they see my furniture being carted halfway down the block to my studio and the buyer's furniture being carted across the street into my house. Since all three places are right on Main Street in the first block as you come into town, it's likely to be noticed by all and sundry. We might get a couple of comments but more people will just shake their heads, maybe smile, and drive on by. That's just the way it is. People get used to the strangest things around here and don't bother themselves about it.
As for the method behind the madness, to get back to the point here, that has to do with being ready, willing, and able to do whatever it takes to get through a Dakota Winter.
In this case, the factor under consideration is 'happiness'.
If I'm going to make it through this Dakota Winter intact I'm going to need every vestive of an edge that I can find and hang on to. For me, the peace and serenity that envelopes me at my studio is more than a vestige of an edge; it's vital, a necessity. I barely made it through the last couple of winters. The prospect of this one frightens me in an elemental way. The long dark of a Dakota Winter must be countered with something more powerful than a listless and vague hope for survival. While the instinct for survival is a force in and of itself, it is not undauntable. Dakota Winters are bloody well DAUNTING.
Happiness is perhaps the most powerful weapon at our disposal with which to battle forces beyond our control. Part of my edge right now is knowing what I need to do and, perhaps more important, the ability to DO it. The studio is haunted; I'd much rather be haunted than daunted, so part of Plan A is for me to put that haunting to good use and exorcise the daunting darkness of this Dakota Winter. That's the happiness factor.
It's not that I'm UNhappy here at my 'good' house. It's that I'm MORE COMPLETELY happy at my studio, and I'm going to be needing that feeling of serenity with which the studio is haunted. It's a tool I want, and need, to put to use this winter.
Hence giving my 'good' house away to a young mother with two little ones. I was in her boat once upon a time and God saw fit to bless my little family with a home of our own - the studio. I've kept it all these years, empty for a good many of them, and perhaps this is the reason. Perhaps it's another turn of the wheel as things come full circle. Who am I to question the mysterious ways of things? All I know is that it feels right, it feels good, and that's enough to guide me.
There are other parts of Plan A which are also parts of every other plan of any letter of the alphabet. These are the tea and vitamins, sleep and eat patterns, using my brain (what's left of it) to the best of my ability, etc.
The thing is that all the parts have to fit together right or nothing will work right.
The factor that concerns me at the moment is the sleep/eat factor.
Because I have to work some nights at my job, and 3-11 pm on other days, my systems are all mixed up. I can't do nights only (which would presumably provide a stable schedule) because I can't get my systems to settle into that schedule. For months I tried doing nights only. It didn't work. The schedule person at work then finally gave me SOME 3-11 shifts, but with the nights still mixed into the equation. That definitely does NOT work. My systems are so screwed up and confused I can't think straight half the time and the other half of the time I'm either sleeping or feel comatose.
I hate to be the one to break the news here, but THAT is not LIFE. It's barely survival. If I've been barely surviving my scheudule during the good part of the Dakota year, what does that say about my chances during the long dark of a Dakota Winter?
See what I mean?
As soon as my friend with the little ones says the word (the word is 'yes'), I can get my things and myself moved, removing that stressor completely from the equation and replacing it with its antithesis. Out with worry and stress, in with peace and serenity - for both of us as a matter of fact. Well, I'm not sure how much peace and serenity she's liable to have with two little kids running around, but they're darned sure to enjoy the running room and playing room. At any rate, both of us will be getting what we want and what else really matters? It's a win-win.
As soon as I'm sure this house is going into caring and loving hands, and my stuff and I are securely settled in the studio, I can address the work schedule issue.
It may well be that the happiness factor of the studio will balance the negative of the schedule. Plus the fact that I do have a Plan B ready to implement on a moment's notice may well provide the needed incentive for the scheduling person to get me off nights, in which case Plan A will work wonderfully well.
At this point I'm willing to give it my best shot, with the stipulation that if my best shot proves to be insufficient I'll go immediately to Plan B.
So that's where it stands at the moment. The next few days will have a lot to say I believe.
If that's not an orderly fashion I don't know what is.
As we walked to our respective vehicles on packed snow and ice, I told him, "I think I want to expand my horizons, you know?"
He responded that he thought that was a great idea, paused as he was getting into his vehicle, and added, "Just go about it in an orderly fashion!"
I answered, "Well you know me! I always do!" and let go with a big belly laugh because he does know me and I NEVER do, apparently.
Even so, there is almost always a method to my madness, which I cleverly conceal behind seemingly random and irrational behaviors.
For instance, at the moment I am in the process of essentially giving away my 'good' house so that I can move half a block away into my 'tumble down cottage', which is quite truthfully a literal wreck of a place. It's one of those apparently irrational behaviors that reinforce the idea that I am indeed a bonified lunatic.
Explaining the method behind this madness here on my blog is not likely to blow my cover, as nobody even knows about it, let alone reads it!
Nobody knows about me giving my house away except a few people at work (one of whom is the buyer) and none of them are confidants of any of my family or people who know me here in my Small Town USA. The first indication they'll have is when they see my furniture being carted halfway down the block to my studio and the buyer's furniture being carted across the street into my house. Since all three places are right on Main Street in the first block as you come into town, it's likely to be noticed by all and sundry. We might get a couple of comments but more people will just shake their heads, maybe smile, and drive on by. That's just the way it is. People get used to the strangest things around here and don't bother themselves about it.
As for the method behind the madness, to get back to the point here, that has to do with being ready, willing, and able to do whatever it takes to get through a Dakota Winter.
In this case, the factor under consideration is 'happiness'.
If I'm going to make it through this Dakota Winter intact I'm going to need every vestive of an edge that I can find and hang on to. For me, the peace and serenity that envelopes me at my studio is more than a vestige of an edge; it's vital, a necessity. I barely made it through the last couple of winters. The prospect of this one frightens me in an elemental way. The long dark of a Dakota Winter must be countered with something more powerful than a listless and vague hope for survival. While the instinct for survival is a force in and of itself, it is not undauntable. Dakota Winters are bloody well DAUNTING.
Happiness is perhaps the most powerful weapon at our disposal with which to battle forces beyond our control. Part of my edge right now is knowing what I need to do and, perhaps more important, the ability to DO it. The studio is haunted; I'd much rather be haunted than daunted, so part of Plan A is for me to put that haunting to good use and exorcise the daunting darkness of this Dakota Winter. That's the happiness factor.
It's not that I'm UNhappy here at my 'good' house. It's that I'm MORE COMPLETELY happy at my studio, and I'm going to be needing that feeling of serenity with which the studio is haunted. It's a tool I want, and need, to put to use this winter.
Hence giving my 'good' house away to a young mother with two little ones. I was in her boat once upon a time and God saw fit to bless my little family with a home of our own - the studio. I've kept it all these years, empty for a good many of them, and perhaps this is the reason. Perhaps it's another turn of the wheel as things come full circle. Who am I to question the mysterious ways of things? All I know is that it feels right, it feels good, and that's enough to guide me.
There are other parts of Plan A which are also parts of every other plan of any letter of the alphabet. These are the tea and vitamins, sleep and eat patterns, using my brain (what's left of it) to the best of my ability, etc.
The thing is that all the parts have to fit together right or nothing will work right.
The factor that concerns me at the moment is the sleep/eat factor.
Because I have to work some nights at my job, and 3-11 pm on other days, my systems are all mixed up. I can't do nights only (which would presumably provide a stable schedule) because I can't get my systems to settle into that schedule. For months I tried doing nights only. It didn't work. The schedule person at work then finally gave me SOME 3-11 shifts, but with the nights still mixed into the equation. That definitely does NOT work. My systems are so screwed up and confused I can't think straight half the time and the other half of the time I'm either sleeping or feel comatose.
I hate to be the one to break the news here, but THAT is not LIFE. It's barely survival. If I've been barely surviving my scheudule during the good part of the Dakota year, what does that say about my chances during the long dark of a Dakota Winter?
See what I mean?
As soon as my friend with the little ones says the word (the word is 'yes'), I can get my things and myself moved, removing that stressor completely from the equation and replacing it with its antithesis. Out with worry and stress, in with peace and serenity - for both of us as a matter of fact. Well, I'm not sure how much peace and serenity she's liable to have with two little kids running around, but they're darned sure to enjoy the running room and playing room. At any rate, both of us will be getting what we want and what else really matters? It's a win-win.
As soon as I'm sure this house is going into caring and loving hands, and my stuff and I are securely settled in the studio, I can address the work schedule issue.
It may well be that the happiness factor of the studio will balance the negative of the schedule. Plus the fact that I do have a Plan B ready to implement on a moment's notice may well provide the needed incentive for the scheduling person to get me off nights, in which case Plan A will work wonderfully well.
At this point I'm willing to give it my best shot, with the stipulation that if my best shot proves to be insufficient I'll go immediately to Plan B.
So that's where it stands at the moment. The next few days will have a lot to say I believe.
If that's not an orderly fashion I don't know what is.
Saturday, October 29, 2011
RAVEN TO WOLF: The Artist In Me ... Still There?
GETTING READY TO PAINT AGAIN
Warming Up...Too Long Away From Paints and Brushes
SERENITY MODE
Setting the Mood
First Abstract in a Long Time
Wolf to Raven
You Just Call Out My Name, And You Know Wherever I Am ...
Friday, October 14, 2011
'Vengeance is MINE,' saith the Lord. And a good thing too, saith ME.
If there's one thing I'm certain of it's that the Wrath of God has got to be far and away more creative and effective than anything I could come up with.
So I say it's a mighty fine thing not to have to worry about it.
By Divine Decree no less, I am commanded to 'Let Go and Let God' as the saying goes.
So I say it's a mighty fine thing not to have to worry about it.
By Divine Decree no less, I am commanded to 'Let Go and Let God' as the saying goes.
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